Ah, High school. The time when you start to understand your feelings. When you finally find yourself. When you know you're finally a grown up and start to make important decisions in life that will totally change your entire future. And also, the time when people start to be real; when they finally bloom into the person they want to be. Well, some people don't bloom, of course.
Just like me, for example.
I haven't fully 'bloomed' yet. I'm under construction. I'm still the same insecure little girl who's jealous of everyone. But I don't show it. I keep my true feelings in a little bottle packed inside my head/heart/body. Instead of showing emotions I want to express, I keep them locked inside because I'm extremely afraid of judgements or what people might think of me as. My whole life consisted of 40% judgements of my physical features so that makes me not want them to judge me for my insides too. I'm the so what if I'm ugly, at least I'm nice type of girl.
*Basically, the moral of this post is don't be like me. Express the feelings you want to show. Shout it out and show it. Okay maybe don't shout it out because that might get you in trouble but still, you need to show it. Don't let it rot in your insides. pop that bottle and let it escape. Whether it's love, hatred, jealousy, envy, just a random joke you really wanna say, an opinion, anything.
*But don't be too open. Never be too open. Some feelings are meant to be hid. You just have to know which one is which.
(I know this post totally makes no sense but this past week I have been in under stress, anxiety, a bit of tears, studies, homework and anything involving school. and I really just want to let some things out. So forgive me for being a little bit obnoxious and/or annoying.)
To make it up to you with this extremely boring post, here is a soccer star with boobs.
(Copyright (c): Images were found in Google)